fuck a mac….

16 03 2010

..apple or big, this shitbeats them both.

stolen from http://blog.bjernies.com/





viking quest; chapter 1

9 11 2009

this is another long overdue post, but back in july me and fortini followed the tour. across france, into switzerland and round the top of italy. theres some photos of what we saw at the college on display that we used as a mascardade for the trip but in reallity whe just wanted some new scran while searching out the mythical euro sasuage.

The country of Europe is superior to the country of Newcastle in many ways, girls are hotter, theres no radgies, it’s perfectly acceptable to sleep in parks or walk into campsites without paying and use their showers. One of the biggest differences is the standard of food. kets and the kind of cheep tat you by at the corner shop are high quality,  service stations sell fresh baguettes and the kind of shit that would be labeled organic or locally produced over here and instantly have the price doubled is the standard for cheep food.

The first discovery on our quest wasn’t in europe but in the bandit country*, an automated chicken paying device.

iphone 020

Not only does this speed up chicken consumption but this also brings me one step closer to my dream of a utopian future in which the streets are lined with rotisserie chicken vending machines.

The second discovery was again in a service station, only this time in france.  straight off the boat we headed to a dodgy rest area that looked like it had a fair few truckers/murders about it. inside many treats awaited us.

iphone 277“PAUSE VITAMINES” gay comment vitamins ? bag of frenchness

Copy of Copy of iphone 007

Caaaandy up, kidnap that fool

while tempted by the vitamin pack, I settled for the litre of chocomilk befor bed time but i needed a little someting something to finish it off. we had to drop a steakout in the diary asle as a french trucker had fallen asleep upright blocking our way to the good shit.

Copy of Copy of froggyC’est merde grande

it was worth the wait, and 2 of the finest euro snacks known to man were revealed to us: the ham cake, and the boiled egg with some mayonaise

iphone 188ham cake

iphone 222egg avec mayonaise, blud

The Italian was particularily fond of these french waffle peices we found in the next service station, as well as the  coeur lion euro cheese wedge, the rolls royce of fromage snacks….

Copy of Copy of iphone 180iphone 255

part 2 of the euro quest will follow shortly……..

 

* bandit country refers to anywhere south of scotch corner





ITS A PAR

8 05 2009

Absolutly gutted, winds been kicking up all day so the table suspeneded by the crain has been called off. got a full refund tho so im off to spend the 70 quid on cereal.

holla at  Dallas Penn.





This is why i’m hot?

7 05 2009

jhrnrxfgukptfibqx1dgiba5o1_500new favorite blog, this is why your fat, some of its pretty stock/shit stuff but there’s some hot joints in there like the “cornhole”, “shake shack double stack”, “the slayer” “the Thunderdome” and “the porkgasm”. The last time i witnessed such a joyous celebration of gluttony while disregarding both taste and ingredient combination conventions was when I made a banana bacon cheese and chocolate sandwich in year 7 home economics.

i2dw5nf19loso0ttxjaxobzxo1_500the corn hole

Corn on the cob wrapped in hickory bacon with two hot dogs and two Colby-Jack cheese sticks wrapped in ground beef.

i2dw5nf19k2ky99ysvjeheewo1_r2_500

Shake Shack Double Stack

A deep fried cheese-stuffed portabello mushroom between two cheeseburgers.

i2dw5nf19jsoc1jbzwjjalxuo1_500

The Slayer

A pile of fries topped with a burger, chili, cherry peppers, andouille, onions smothered in jack cheese.

i2dw5nf19jrl14dluhojafqro1_500

The Thunderdome

Three stacks of bacon, sausage, elk meat, onions and cheese between tortillas all topped with sour cream, two fried eggs and scallions.

i2dw5nf19kx3215zo37yggggo1_500-1

The Porkgasm

Bacon strips, bacon sausage, ham sausage, ham slices, smoked pork sausage and roasted pork belly surrounded by ground sausage shaped into a pig, wrapped in bacon and roasted. Garnished with chili ears and tail.

They’ve got a book deal and are taking an open application for entries so get you cameras out and your arteries clogged





white castle fries only come in one size

16 04 2009

the black bish avoiding a red bull viral marketing campaign

the black bish knows how to eat, would a shit bag be an unfair advantage in a eating contest? switch to a bigger bag and you can you pound more?

bish's jizzy scran

bish loves scran so much when he saw his pub lunch he jizzed!

and he still ate that shit! holla

regardless hes got the knowledge when it comes to the best eating joints in town, here he is with teddy from hangtime searching for the ultimate lil’ sumthin sumthin, the white castle burger. I cant belive ive been to america four times and never hit the joint.

edit: just checked out the blog stats to see how people were coming onto this

Search Engine Terms

These are terms people used to find your blog.

Today

Search Views
lass getting fuked in gateshead 1




“ME NAME LOUIS AS WELL MON!”

15 04 2009

While the sweeds que out the door to pound wackdonalds this dudes smokin blunts and  selling pastys to drunks.

he didnt have any ting, just “bashment” sauce, three hands and his cutchie.he sits in his shed all night pumping out bounty killa and sizzla to fight off the swedish winds.the grape drink was appealing but there were no chicken and waffles to go with it so I setlled for the ginger ale
unfortunatly me being a baldhead pussieclot, jah is not within and the jamican fire ale wasn’t enough, so i had to reachfor the 7/11 calzone for warmth.
calzone

Go one then, Go on then

swedish 7/11 is amazing, like being transported to america, I dont even remeber what this tasted of but it was hot and sobering, god knows how much this cost.

mystery filing

mystery filling

they also had sweets named after faeces

bare lolz

bare lolz